Wife has an affair because her husband refuses to… talk

A cloth stall owner in Dong Xuan market has a retired husband. Every morning, he helps his wife clear the goods, and after finishing work, his wife spends 200,000 VND to eat breakfast and drink coffee. She assured that he did not lack anything from sexual needs, but she was always ready to meet other material needs, so his affair was something she could not understand.

An engineer saw that his wife had suspicious signs of adultery, he thought that he had been busy doing business for a long time and did not pay enough attention to his wife’s physiological needs, so from that day on, he increased his sexual relations. often, until one day caught, his wife still texted her lover to date. He bellowed: “Isn’t that enough?”.

Therefore, in order to prevent adultery, first of all, it is necessary to answer the question why people cheat? If we accidentally saw a scene where a man and woman riding a motorbike together sneaked into a “lodge” on the side of the road, we wouldn’t hesitate to conclude, what else would they do if they weren’t “to bed?” ” and from that it follows that the cause of adultery is sex.

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In fact, this phenomenon is more complex than we think and of course it is not possible to prevent anything without understanding its deep roots. This is a letter from a wife to a marriage psychologist.

“I (Kim) is 34 years old, married for 8 years. We have a 6-year-old son together and family life can be said to be okay. But lately I’ve been feeling bewildered, with many sleepless nights. My husband still doesn’t know anything about this because it is still hidden deep in my heart. It is impossible not to admit that my husband is a decent man who lives responsibly with his family. He used to give me this and that to show his love for me. The only thing that frustrates me is that he doesn’t like talking to his wife. It is better to just sit in front of the screen or read one newspaper after another than to talk to me. He’s really like that, even telling him is too much!

Perhaps my life would go on quietly like that if not for a day, a close friend of my husband appeared. He often came to my house to play and it was he who stirred my heart when it had been sleeping for a long time. I often think of that person and long to meet him. As I write these lines, I do feel a bit ashamed, but it’s true. I try not to think about that person but I can’t. I’m not sure if he feels the same way but every time we see each other, I have a hunch that he does. He has an advantage that my husband does not have is that he likes to talk to me. Especially when he comes and my husband is away, he can sit and talk with me for hours without getting bored. We’ve been talking to each other on the internet a lot lately.

We share the joys and sorrows of life. I like the way he talks to be both insightful and witty. Every day that I can’t talk to each other for a while, I feel like something is missing. Now, it seems that something is about to happen, I fear it and wait. I seem to be at the crossroads of love, not knowing where fate will take me. Through this short letter, I am sure that the psychologist understands me and even though I do not know what kind of person he considers me, I sincerely ask him for advice.”

From that letter, we can probably imagine how adultery might begin? First of all there is a lack in marriage of at least one side, when people crave something unfulfilled that makes them sad, miserable. With this wife, her need is to talk, a common need of most women.

There are things a wife wants to share with her husband, which all the gifts in this world cannot replace. Her husband took care of his wife in different ways but not the way she wanted so he didn’t add any love units to his account in his wife’s love bank and accidentally he hurt a friend.

Meanwhile, her husband’s close friend (temporarily calling him Tuan) can do that. Maybe at first Tuan did not intend to molest your wife, when he often talked to Kim, but unexpectedly that was what this woman needed and so every time he had an intimate conversation with your wife, he I accidentally added to my account each unit of love.

At first, Kim just liked to chat with Tuan and had no other intentions. But every time we talked, she felt delighted and surprised to realize how much she needed it. She knew it was risky with her marriage but felt she couldn’t help it and just like that, Tuan became the desired object of a new love.

As it turns out, each of us has emotional needs and if someone gets it right, even by accident, they automatically add to our bank each unit of love and their account just keeps on adding each other. growing up to a certain threshold will make our heart skip a beat, we can’t resist liking them and overcoming that threshold is love.

Who people love or hate is not decided by their reason, but in fact, it is governed by the love bank, independent of our will.

Kim did not reveal to her husband the sadness of her heart because her husband did not talk. It is common in marriage that when the wife complains about something, she often encounters the discomfort or anger of her husband. There is no hope for the satisfaction of each other’s emotional needs but only one person hurting the other because their needs are always denied by the other.

Kim could have persevered in choosing the opportunity to express her desire, creating an opportunity for her husband to meet that need, but she did not, simply because now she had Tuan. He became attractive because he always enjoyed talking to her and that was what she really wanted.

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One day, a man about 45 years old drove his car to the marriage counseling office. Look at a very stylish man, politely dressed, politely spoken. I was a little surprised to hear that he came because of his wife’s affair. He introduced himself as the owner of a car shop with a monthly income of hundreds of millions and his wife stayed at home to take care of the children. He provided for his wife and children with no shortage of anything, and he thought that she was certainly satisfied with that life.

Suddenly, one day, he accidentally caught a message from his wife on a date with a mistress at 3 pm. He secretly set up a trap to get caught. He lied to his wife that tomorrow he had to go to Hai Phong, which is more than 100 kilometers away from home, to receive the goods. But he only pretended to go a little way and then came back secretly ambushed and caught his wife red-handed with his mistress. They took each other to a place about twenty kilometers from home to a refreshment bar to sit and talk to each other. It was an empty restaurant, two people found a hidden corner to sit close together. Watching from afar, he saw that sometimes they held hands, sometimes with their heads together. Unable to keep his composure anymore, he burst into the shop and caught him, slapped his wife hard and brought her back.

He asked the psychologist to explain why his wife had an affair when life was full, especially sexual relations were never lacking. He made his wife do a review for two days, but she said she only came to talk to the motorbike taxi driver for a while and then returned because her husband never talked to his wife.

That’s how strong a woman’s need to talk is. Hopefully, after reading this article, husbands realize their weaknesses and never think that talking to their wives is a waste of time, talking to others is more preferable. If he keeps leaving his goal open and trying to kick someone’s “golf”, one day there will be someone who “shoots” in the net at any time.

Is not ‘carnal affairs’ called adultery?

She went to Da Lat with her husband, and brazenly said: “What else can Dung eat?” but she was worried…

According to giadinhonline.vn