Many parents feel that their children are becoming more and more distant from them without understanding the reason until reading this article

When their children grow up, many parents are startled to feel that their children are like strangers, no longer as close as before.

Children often avoid not wanting to confide or do not respond to messages from parents. This causes parents a headache, not understanding why their children are “estranged” from them.

In fact, the fault is not due to the child’s unruly, contrary character. According to psychosocial studies, the cause of separation is due to the following mistakes of parents:

1. Let your negative emotions affect your child

You don’t need to hide your feelings from your children, but you do need to know how to better manage and find ways to deal with them. Parents often think children are too young to understand, but they are actually quite sensitive.

Constant stress can make you irritable with all your child’s requests, making them afraid to approach their parents.

2. My parents always think I’m right

Disagreement is normal in every argument. However, for many parents, every time a child expresses an opinion, it is a “lying” behavior. Parents always think that they have more life experience than their children and are always right in all cases. Even when they’re wrong, parents are hesitant to admit it.

It is this stubbornness that makes children gradually become distant and do not want to talk much with their parents. Because I feel that my opinions are not heard and accepted.

3. Use of power

Older parents often use the familiar saying: “I did everything for you, now that you grow up, you become ungrateful”. These parents think they have a lot of power over their children and try to keep that power, even as their children begin to lead independent lives.

4. Ignore what your children say

Young children do not always have confidence, so when they actively seek their parents, it means they want to be cared for. If you get so caught up in your work that you don’t spend quality time with your child, your child will think he’s not a priority and doesn’t matter. This feeling makes the child’s feelings for his parents fade away.

When your child comes to you because he wants to say something important, stop what you’re doing, make eye contact, and give him full interaction.

5. Parents do not realize that their children have grown up

In the eyes of many parents, children are always small and small. They do not realize that their children have grown up and have mature thoughts and separate directions in life. Many people still retain the impression of their children from a young age. For example, when I was a child, I was a bit clumsy and spent extravagantly. But when I grow up, I am more careful and thrifty, even becoming a financial manager.

However, in the eyes of parents, children are always wasteful and clumsy. This misconception causes them to unintentionally push their children away from them.

6. Constantly talking about problems makes your kids feel worse

Parents asking the same question over and over again can make their children feel annoyed, making them want to solve the problem on their own.

We all deal with stress in different ways and our children are no exception. That’s why parents instead of forcing their children to say what they don’t want, ask less.

7. Tell outsiders about mother and daughter’s secret

If parents like to tell people around them secrets their children only want to share with them, they won’t be comfortable. That action hurts the children’s feelings, makes them worry, and even decide not to confide in their parents anymore.

8. Parents ignore boundaries

If you want your children to respect you, you must also respect your children first. There should also be personal boundaries between parents and children. Many parents often arbitrarily view diaries, monitor personal Facebook pages, read messages secretly, making their children feel disrespected and violated their privacy.

This makes children hide their thoughts, be on guard, deliberately avoid parents and hide in separate rooms. The long-term accumulation of inhibition causes the relationship of the two sides to be severely affected.

9. Do not allow children to be independent

At a certain age, children will want more freedom, to do what they like. When this happens, some parents often consider it disrespectful or they are losing control over their child. This can lead to parents being more restrained.

In this case, instead of setting stricter rules, parents let their children be independent and themselves are only responsible for observing. When children feel that their parents believe in them, they will grow up and live more responsibly.

10. Parents “always listen but never understand”

Whenever I present my point of view, we all cut in and don’t wait for the child to finish. Instead of “How do you feel”, parents always say: “You have to be like this”, “Why are you doing this?”. Parents always listen half-heartedly and do not really understand, becoming a confidant for their children to rely on.

Whenever a child wants to talk, the best thing parents need to do is listen to their child silently and absolutely do not interfere in the child’s emotional circuit.